Natural Opinions

An Archive Of My Thoughts

SSSSOOOO tired

I used to think that I was better than those people. The dispassionate, the disinterested. Those who did not appreciate the glorious simplicity of mathematics. I used to think that physics was better than math. After all, wasn't math derived from physics?

When I was a child, I believed that everything came back to Biology, and Physics was the work of ungodly men who were only interested in corrupting the world with their disrespectful rules and regulations, men who wanted to confine and confuse. And then my understanding grew, and Physics became as a sort of holy grail for humanity, holding the secrets of the multi-verse, my preconceived notions of unholy or blasphemous teachings inherent in Physics turned to awe of its beautiful functions and forms.

And then I came to college, where I am still determined to pursue that idea, that delicate notion, of a physically sound multi-verse, where time and location are reconciled. In college, I began to meet individuals who had no understanding of the Physics. Like I was saying, there were people who I met at college who had no idea about the story I was telling them of how wonderful Physics was and how it was going to change everything.

Then I took some time to listen to what they had to say, and was taken aback by my total ignorance. I learned that there were men and women who dedicated their learning to Music, still others to Art, Writing, so on and so forth with equally amazing results. Far superior than any of my miserable physics had produced, what point was there to predictions and calculations when I could have been producing sweet music, lyrical poetry or engrossing artwork? I felt very ashamed at my stupidity.

I met some other scientists, mostly individuals who were interested in Biology, or Chemistry, or Psychology, or perhaps a Sociologist. I still have yet to meet someone who is interested solely in physics at the college. No-one in my family, and none of my friends are particularly interested in physics for physics' sake, they prefer to use it like a toy for blowing stuff up or finding lost nails. It can be very lonesome, and it makes me unhappy to think that I am perhaps misguided in my search for understanding what makes reality... reality. My personal search for God, I suppose. An attempt to reconcile my soul with my brain.

And then I began to notice that while there were a lot of liberal art majors and humanities majors walking around, there were still a lot of people in my math courses. And I became curious as to why people didn't wonder where the math came from, why they thought it had "no practical application". So it became clear that it wasn't a course of individuals not appreciating physics, it was a misunderstanding of where physics was equated to math. Which was so incredibly alien to me... it made me feel like I had gone insane and was experiencing some kind of fever dream where Einstein, Newton, Leibniz, Von Braun, Tyson and Hawking had never even existed!

But then it occurred to me that this was perhaps not a bad thing: that people are learning math without a foreknowledge of what it is used for. It encourages creativity. So to end this blathering of mine, I would simply like to say: Rejoice that they are learning about the math, without learning why or learning to enjoy it, they will be bettered for it, and you will be bettered by seeing just how important it is to take it seriously as a discipline.